A keychain bestiary
Hoardlings
Every dungeon has monsters.
Your monster hatches from an egg.
Hoardlings is a pocket creature on a real colour-screen handheld — fed by hand, trained by your daily steps, sharpened in minigames. The monsters you'd normally fight at the end of the dungeon? Now you raise them.
- 1.54″ colour IPS
- 240×240
- 3 buttons
- USB-C
- 3+ day battery
- 34 g
drag to rotate · scroll to zoom · exploded view inside
The Taleof a monster raised well
IYou are not the hero
In 1997 you kept a creature alive on a keychain. Hoardlings is that idea grown up: a real colour screen, real buttons, a real device — and a creature with real stakes.
IIThe dungeon monster is a baby
It hatches in five minutes. What it becomes depends entirely on how you raise it: every meal, every scolding, every walk is written into its 64-byte soul.
IIICare is the combat
There are no battles. The fight is hunger, hygiene and discipline. Neglect it and it sickens; leave it too long and it runs away — and you'll have to win it back.
The Training Groundsthree paths, one creature
Six stats govern every hoardling — fullness, happiness, hygiene, energy, discipline, and weight measured in dag. Everything you do moves them.
By hand
Meals and snacks (it will refuse both if it isn't hungry or is getting heavy), cleaning up messes, scoldings that build discipline but cost joy, lights-out sleep, and the occasional quiet petting. The work of any good keeper.
- Meals fill it up; snacks cheer it up
- Scoldings: +discipline, −happiness, once every 30 minutes
- Sleep restores energy — waking it early is a care mistake
On foot
Sync with the iPhone app and your own steps become training. 5,000 steps earns one training point, 8,000 earns two, 10,000 earns three. Points make it happier and keep it lean — and enough of them change what it becomes.
- Walks burn weight and lift happiness
- Train hard enough and a special evolution unlocks
- Step-training beats genetics
At play
Three minigames on three buttons — quick sessions that cost a little hunger and energy, pay in happiness, and keep the weight down.
- Catch — food falls in three lanes; catch it with A / B / C
- Rhythm — call-and-repeat patterns that grow longer
- Memory — hidden sequences, three to seven steps
The Bestiarysixteen hoardlings · one egg
Every hoardling hatches the same: a mote of dungeon dust. From there, the branches diverge — and every branch is a story about how it was raised.
Roughly three weeks from egg to final form. Care mistakes as a child set the branch; care as a teen sets the ending. Even a Gunk can become a Phoenix if the days improve.
The Vesselthe screen is the product
| Specimen record | |
|---|---|
| Display | 1.54″ colour IPS, 240×240, SPI at 40 MHz |
| Brain | ESP32-C3 module — BLE 5, no Wi-Fi, no cloud on device |
| Power | Replaceable 400 mAh Li-Po · USB-C · 3+ days per charge |
| Controls | Three buttons · any button wakes it from sleep |
| Voice | Piezo chirps and fanfares |
| Body | 58 × 44 × 16 mm · 34 g · keychain loop · MJF-printed shell, first run |
| Link | Bluetooth LE sync with the iPhone app |
Choose its armour
Four shell colours at launch. Pick one on the campaign — or spin the model above until you find yours.
Serious about sleep. It ticks once a minute and naps in between — deep sleep with a 60-second heartbeat, so a charge lasts days, not hours. Missed time while it slept is made up the moment it wakes.
The Companion Vaultan iPhone app, for the hoard at large
The device holds one hoardling — that's the point. The vault holds the rest. Pull a monster off the device, keep it in the app, push another back. Its whole self travels as a 64-byte soul, checksum and all.
Your steps feed its training through HealthKit, and the weekly leaderboards keep score: who walked, who trained, whose hoardling thrives.
iPhone at launch. The device itself never touches Wi-Fi and never talks to a cloud — its world is the screen, the buttons, and you.
The vault holds
- Live view of your hoardling when paired
- Monster vault — pull from device, store, push back
- Step training via HealthKit
- Weekly leaderboards, friends and global
- Over-the-air firmware updates
- Sign in with Apple
Spoilspledge tiers · early birds eat first
Launching on Kickstarter. The first batch of 500 is assembled at home, by hand, by the one person building all of this.
Early Bird
- One device
- Choice of four shell colours
Standard
- One device
- Choice of four shell colours
Two-Pack
- Two devices
- A rival to raise beside yours
Dev Kit
- One device with SWD access
- Firmware source
- For tinkerers and homebrewers
Founder
- One device
- Your name in the app credits
- An exclusive hoardling
After the campaign
- Second-run devices, once the first batch ships
- Late pledges open for 60 days after close
The campaign opens soon. The date is set when the prototype passes its gates — no promises before their time.
Watch the hoard growAsked at the Gatequestions, answered plainly
When can I buy one?
Hoardlings launches on Kickstarter. The date is set once the working prototype passes its own tests — battery life, step training, monster transfer. Early birds get the first 200 units at $49.
Is there an Android app?
iPhone at launch. An Android app is a stretch goal on the campaign — a hope with a price tag, not a promise.
How long does the battery last?
Three or more days per charge with normal play. It charges over USB-C, and the 400 mAh cell is replaceable — no glue, no ceremony.
What happens if I ignore it?
It remembers. Left hungry or dirty it accumulates care mistakes; six hours of real neglect and it falls sick; forty-eight hours sick and it runs away — never before day three. A runaway can be reunited with, though it comes back humbled.
Does it need Wi-Fi or an account?
No. The device is Bluetooth-only and holds no cloud anything — its world is the screen, three buttons, and you. The app adds the vault and leaderboards, with Sign in with Apple.
Can my monster battle my friend's monster?
There's no combat — the game is care, training and minigames, and the competition is the weekly leaderboard. Extra species and seasonal surprises may arrive as stretch goals or after launch, never as necessities.
Who is building this?
One person, evenings and weekends — firmware, hardware, app, and the first 500 units assembled by hand at a kitchen table. Small is the feature, not the bug.